Drowning in sauce

Something doesn't feel right… I sit up from my bed and run into the bathroom. Am I going to throw up? It sure feels like it. I fall to my knees by the toilet, throwing the lid up feverishly and leaning my head over the bowl. My insides churn, and a stabbing pain in my chest appears without warning. I clutch my shitty terrible band T-shirt, praying the pain might fade as quickly as it appeared. No luck, as it gets worse, and I can feel my body physically retch. I lean over as much as I can, unable to stop what's about to happen. Finally, I vomit, my stomach, chest, and throat burning horrendously as my body finally ejects whatever it decided it didn't want inside me. My eyes are sealed shut, as waves of foul liquid spew from me. The smell is sickly sweet to my nose, but I don't have a lot of time to think about it as I continue losing waves and waves of liquid.

After what feels like an eternity, I have a small break from puking and try to catch my breath. My whole body is on fire, my chest most especially, the stabbing and shooting becoming worse. Even after spilling my guts, it still feels like something shouldn't be in me. My chest, full of something unknown, the pain slowly spreading to other parts of my body. I have to get to a hospital…… I think before finally opening my eyes, horrified at the sight of the toilet bowl.

Its……. Honey Mustard.

The thought alone makes me want to vomit again.

I clutch my shirt again as the pain spreads once more, spreading down to my hands with a pain I've never experienced before. It feels like lava in my veins, hot and bubbling under every inch of my skin. In the darkness, pain, and confusion I fall over clawing my arm on the tile. I wince holding it tightly, I expect blood but when I look down I do not find it.

Instead, I find yellow-speckled liquid running down my arm from the site of the cut. So sweet….

I don't even have time to process the horror before my legs begin signaling me of the same pain. My whole body soon feels consumed by the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. I sob, unable to think or do much else with pain this intense. My nose burns as my tears and cuts permeate the room with the stench of sweet mustard. I cough, unable to bring my hands to cover my mouth, and spew the liquid onto the tile of the bathroom. Praying for death, unable to take anymore, I finally close my eyes and lose consciousness.

When my roommates look for me the next day, I know all they will find is sweet sweet honey mustard on the bathroom floor.