For the first time in a long time (too long to mention)
I read a poem about Paris and didn't picture your face
I didn't see your brown eyes or the dimple in your chin
Rather, an almost-stranger with black hair and blue eyes appeared to me;
he wore a black coat to match his hair and strolled down the streets of the Marais, hands in pockets.
It snowed in my head because it snowed in the poem;
And it was strange to see him there in your stead - you, who lived in Paris with me briefly, who walked with me down the very streets this almost-stranger swaggered through
I say "almost" because I only met him once; I cannot say I know him
And yet, he feels known, this unknown man - the night was freezing (no snow, though) when he held out his hand to me.
A long time ago (too long to mention), I started privately wishing you well when the clock read 11:11
If we were together or apart, I thought, "I wish for your happiness."
Well, habits become habitual and now I can't stop:
11:11 comes twice a day: I repeat those words.
*
Last night in the park on the first warm day of spring, I saw a little girl
Maybe six years old. Her chestnut bangs fell on the rims of her thick black glasses.
Her mouth circled by the residue of a blue popsicle.
Her left forearm in a cast-
poor thing. She chased a hen.
Maybe she was an odd child - I don't know. I'm speculating.
She might struggle in friendship, love nature, hold magnifying glasses over worms wriggling in the earth
But she seemed wild and happy and free.
And I thought about your future daughter, and could only wish upon you a child so present:
in the world
in the grass
in play
in popsicle-eating.
Now at 11:11, I include the girl in the park,
her happiness, yours and your little girl's,
the almost-stranger who appeared to me in real life and then in a poem.
My own, too, if I happen to find the time.



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