Satire
Now Hiring
Three to five years of work experience in a related field required. The lethal phrase mocks me from the very, very bottom of the webpage. Hastily, I scroll back to the top, wondering if I’d misread the job listing. I hadn’t: Junior Research Assistant, Entry Level, it claims.
By Stories By Ell4 years ago in Fiction
Hector the Protector
“Hector! Come hither!” bellowed the drawling screech of King Aloysius. Hector jumped at the booming voice of his master, and scuttled through the stone hallways of the King’s Court, tripping over his pointed, belled slippers, landing squarely at the feet of the King. As he stumbled to stand, his hat brushed His Majesty’s nether regions, causing the servant to stutter his apologies.
By Renessa Norton4 years ago in Fiction
The Job
Father didn’t want The Job. He posed in his blue suit across the desk from Mr. Major anyway, counting the ticks of the wall clock. Sweat itched across his scalp and beaded along his hairline. Mr. Major flipped a page in his hand and scowled at Father’s resume.
By Dillon R Morgan4 years ago in Fiction
And Everyone Clapped
I literally live on minimum wage, I’m doing just fine. I don’t get why people think you can’t. I work from 9am to 9pm Sunday through Friday, so that’s 72 hours a week, getting paid $8.25. I make about $600 a week and even saved up enough to visit Disneyland.
By T. J. Ward4 years ago in Fiction
Satire Of The Subsidized
Charlotte grew up in an assisted living townhouse in Sudbury, Ontario. Her father wasn’t around all that much so it was just her mother, brother and herself. Charlotte is still unsure who to believe, mom said dad cheated and was a deadbeat however dad said mom was controlling and constantly picking fights. Perhaps both sides of the story are correct but each one shone a better light on themselves. Charlotte’s mother, Kelly most certainly is the strongest woman Charlotte has ever met, she raised two of the worst children, maintained the household with the help of no man, kept everything clean and tidy, worked at a gas station and attended college all at the same time over several years. Pondering how she survived even a day overwhelms Charlotte. Obviously she lost her patience more than once a day and Charlotte doesn’t blame her however it definitely did make for a toxic home. Self care isn’t just important for one self but also does favours to those around. Every day was constant yelling and screaming and crying. Of course, monkey see, monkey do so Charlotte’s brother, Max and herself were hellish monsters. The shit they put her through, the shit she put them through.
By Kimberly Desrosiers4 years ago in Fiction
The Slop Shop
I read an interesting story once about a pig who decided to build a slop distillery just below a large birds’ nest (Think Animal Farm). He didn’t even get a chance to pitch the idea to the birds and their posh pig friends before they pecked at his flesh and tore holes into his equipment. “We don’t want that horrible shop in our neighborhood! The property value of our nests will decrease as soon as you put up the first brick!”
By Natarielle Sonshine4 years ago in Fiction
