dating
All about dating. First dates, three years into a relationship, Tinder, and more.
The Fresh Breath of Air
I've been through my fair share of cruddy relationships. I've dated the user, the abuser, the cheater, etc., and I've probably fallen into their toxic web at some point. 21 (almost 22) years old and I've had my heart broken more than I'd like to admit. I was in a relationship for four years with who I thought was my "high school sweetheart." He was my best friend and over time we got closer and decided to take it to the next level. After four years of being taken advantage of and being cheated on, I decided to walk away. Several months later, I met someone who made me believe in love again. He was perfect. Or so I thought. Things were going great for the first few months. Then BAM! Reality hit me like a train going full speed. I noticed his behavior was a little off and given the time we had spent together, I could tell when something wasn't right. We sat down and had a heart-to-heart and he revealed that he had been smoking meth. I was totally thrown. I've smoked marijuana before but would NEVER dare touch any kind of hardcore drug. My aunt was a meth addict and lost everything (her five kids, her car, her house, the whole schbang). I then told him that if he wanted to continue with his nasty habit that he would have to do it single because I refused to endure the same pain my aunt caused my family. He begged and pleaded and said he would quit and get help. Weeks went by, everything was normal. Then the funky behavior came back. I knew exactly what the problem was. At this point, I was so stupid and "in love" with him (or so I thought) that I wanted to help and support him through his addiction. This broke me, mentally and spiritually. There were days I would just lay in bed and not say a word. I wouldn't eat. I constantly asked myself "Why am I dealing with this?" Alcohol, anti-anxiety meds, and depression meds became a part of my everyday life. I had to have these to function and pull myself out of bed in the morning. Part of me stayed because I was so attached to him and because he was my comfort zone. My friends kept telling me to drop him and run but I just didn't listen. Ten months I dealt with the emotional abuse. He constantly accused me of sleeping with people, went through my phone, tracked my location, hell, he even tracked my odometer on my car. I couldn't go to the grocery store without getting accused of something. If my phone ever died, the world was about to end. So, after ten months of this, we finally split (and let me tell you it was NOT pretty). I was relieved that him and I were done, but part of me was still latched onto him. My other aunt always told me I was a healer. I would attract the broken ones and try my best to fix them. I always put others before myself and ended up broken in the end. Anyways, I found it very hard to start dating again. I would meet up with people and I would get on Tinder (BIG mistake). I just couldn't stay interested in anyone long enough and was too scared to give my heart to anyone. Then one day, I met Chris. We had talked over social media for about two months and finally decided to meet for drinks. I was blown away. There was no awkward-ness. It just felt right. His personality was almost identical to mine and we got along great. We've been dating for almost a month now and he never ceases to amaze me. He makes sure I'm taken care of. Not just materialistically, but spiritually. He cares and makes it known. He's secure within. There is no digging through my phone or tracking me. He is my fresh breath of air. Moral of this story is...never EVER settle for less. Know your worth. Love yourself. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. And damn, let me tell you, that fresh breath of air after drowning for so long is exhilarating.
By Courtney England8 years ago in Humans
Ways to Tell If You're the Side Chick
If you're Googling this question, you're most likely the side chick. A woman's intuition is very strong, and feeling as if something is off in your relationship is reason enough to question your stance in a man's life, especially if he shows any of these signs.
By Kelsey Lange8 years ago in Humans
Online Heartbreak
In the beginning I never used to see the allure in online relationships but as I grew into my mid-teens such relationships were quite popular. With websites such ad IMVU and Second Life you could really become anyone you wanted to and date your dream guy. I eventually got sucked into the madness of it all.
By Shanice Rangira8 years ago in Humans
Hell into Heaven: Chapter 4
Chapter 4: Jesse February, 2011 I've only been talking to Nikki for such a short amount of time and for some reason she's the only person I want to talk to no matter what mood I'm in. When I tell her about my day at work, or at school, or even at home she really listens to me and tells me her opinions with full honesty. I felt bad for her when she had her court date and the judge didn't help her out. She's been staying strong each day since she went back to her parents but I haven't really been able to talk to her as much as before due to her not having a computer near and her cellphone is a prepaid to where she gets charged a lot for texting and calling. Sometimes she's able to sleep over at a friend's house that has access to a computer. During those times we practically talked throughout the whole night.
By J.A.K. Hansen8 years ago in Humans
What It Means To Get Out
I was the victim of an abusive relationship for two and a half years. There were good times. There were bad times. In the end, it wasn't until I looked back that I saw just how bad the bad times were. I have always had self esteem issues. I have discerned my own value based on how I believed others viewed me. The problem is, when you think everyone only sees the worst in you, you end up only seeing the worst in yourself. What does that have do to with surviving an abusive relationship? I'm getting there. You can only see where you are when you see where you've been and how you got there and now... here. So I saw my worst and was blind to my best. I was desperate to be loved and accepted because I thought I was so worthless. I went from person to person searching for that love. My relationships were shallow and degrading. I accepted being the side girl when I wanted to be the main girl. I accepted being controlled and manipulated because I believed it was better than being alone. Over time, I accepted worse and worse treatment until finally, I hit rock bottom.
By Kristen Campbell8 years ago in Humans
The Truly-Toxic Lover
A major buzz-word in the relationship world these days is “toxicity” and/or whether or not you're in a “toxic relationship.” But, before we can truly decide whether we are in a toxic relationship, we must first determine what makes a person toxic, poisonous or hazardous to your health.
By Zach Jensen8 years ago in Humans
